Friday, December 03, 2010

"a small, good thing"


Short stories, in my opinion, are sort of the perfect form for mothers of young kids who want to fit some lit into their lives. The short story for which this post is named (by Raymond Carver) is particularly wonderful (if heartbreaking).

Another thing that I, at least, find very helpful as a mom of very young kids is to record some of the small, good things that happen each day. Probably too overwhelming to be realistic to accomplish, but I need to at least record a few, because there are a few things that keep coming back to my mind. They were so small, but they meant so much, even months and weeks later.

So thank you, Tuckahoe Man, for approaching me in the baby pool just to tell me that you saw me bolusing Will and thought that I had a great, casual attitude about it towards little Will. I know I was awkward, but I really did appreciate you sharing the experience of your friend, whose son also had an ng tube. Thank you for telling me I was doing a great job. I needed to hear that, especially that day.

And thank you, education specialist at Kluge Children's Rehab. Will loved the time he had with you, and it was the time I most looked forward to every day we were there, but what I really want to record is how moved I was that you could finish my sentence about why I had felt so stressed out over the summer with trying to get Will to eat that I became too forceful about it. "You wanted to avoid surgery." That was exactly it. I realize that it must seem so obvious to anyone reading this, but I think it often isn't obvious, especially to all the medical professionals we meet with. You had such a gentle, loving way. You made me feel like I had done well with Will. I wished that I could go over to your house for tea and book club and holidays. Your children, if you have them, are lucky. I must send you a card.

Thank you, Brighten, who was so aptly named, for calling me to keep up with how Will and I were doing. Thank you for praying for him. I know it must seem so small, but it wasn't to me.

Thank you, Brant, for dropping off that wonderful little Batman thank you note to Will. He reads it every night. I am glad you found the truck he gave you to be "beautiful." Likewise to your card.

Boys, try to remember that even in the most stressful times (maybe especially during them?) there are always some small, good things to be found out there.

3 comments:

Jacqueline Auna and family said...

He's so handsome, Allie! You are a most inspiring mother, wonderfully candid and insightful. I'm so glad that Will is healthy and happy. I feel so guilty and I feel like such a bad friend! Please know I love you guys!

Unknown said...

What a sweet post. I love this picture of WIll too! He has changed so much since the last time I saw him.

Eliza said...

I love this. I know I have told you before but you are so brave and I really admire you. I'm glad you have had so many "small, good things" to help you along the way so far.

By the way I have thought of suggesting at our RS book club that we try a short story once in a while. There is still lots to discuss and so much less pressure. I have a few favorites in mind to suggest. Maybe if I ever (a) go to book club and (b) remember the idea while I am there, I will suggest it.