Wednesday, January 02, 2013

2013 is going to be our best year yet

I am terrible about organizing our photos. I take many shots and videos, but I am bad about uploading them to our costco website and even worse about printing and storing them. I think I have 3 photos of Will printed. None of Porter. I was inspired by this presentation at TED and have been taking daily video footage of the kids, just for a minute or so or less. You would be surprised at how rich and informative a second a day of video for a year is. I feel like 2012 was the best year yet, and 2013 will only be better. It will be awesome to have the year encapsulated into a few minutes of footage. Also it will be proof to the kids later that we really do fun stuff all the time, though I fully intend to include footage of them just walking down the hall into their classrooms or watching our movie per our Friday Night Movie Night tradition, or people throwing tantrums, because that is all our life and I want to remember every bit.

Today and tomorrow Andrew is the only kid not to have school. We spent our alone time together mostly at Porter's school this morning, but tomorrow I want to do something more special just for Andrew. These two mornings are the only days alone we have had since Will was born, really, unless you count when Will napped, which would make it 3 years ago. Andrew has had a tough couple of months--the feeding program routine was hardest on him, surprisingly, but it has been amazing and wonderful to watch him bloom back into his happy, agreeable, hilarious little self under the steady glow of lots of positive attention and praise (thank you, applied behavioral analysis theory). I know I don't know zillions of 7 year old boys, but I think Andrew has an unusually hilarious and sophisticated sense of humor and that it is going to be a lot of fun living with him as he grows up.

Porter, at school today, loaded up his baby doll into the baby seat of the grocery cart, donned his safety goggles, and set about shopping in his classroom. He would periodically pick up his doll to kiss her or pat her back. He told us her name was Claire. I allowed myself some moments of pride that Porter was demonstrating a sweetness and affection he learned from me, from how I treat him. At a later point that day he also smeared bubble potion on his face, informed me that he was putting on makeup, and asked me whether he looked pretty. So I model that, too. It has only been a few weeks of Brigham spending more time at home, but perhaps later his influence will be observable soon, too.

I feel like I have approached each new year the last few years with a sense of sadness that the year closing had been difficult and stressful, and that I wished (not hoped) the year to come would bring improvement. This year is so different. Will is still not easy to feed, but he is feed-able. Andrew's difficult behaviors have disappeared, and when things flare up in any of the kids I feel confident that it perfectly handleable, not some dire red flag. Brigham has done as well professionally as he possibly could, and he has now kept his commitment to be home by 7pm most nights (see also Andrew's improved behavior). I have some personal and family goals that I am excited about, and which we are taking a day at a time to slowly check off the to-do list. I finally feel like I am turning into the mom and person I want to be. (Sorry older kids!)


Monica Rich said...

Seems we've had very similar thoughts about the new year ahead. I will add to my (ever growing) list of resolutions to meet up with you and your crew in 2013. Anika is moving to Williamsburg, so now I'll have two reasons to drive south. :)

Ashley said...

Photo/video management is the worst. I HATE that kind of stuff--not only is it tedious and time-consuming, but it also involves technology and computer saavy that I just don't have. Thank goodness blogging requires me to occasionally upload/save some stuff (we use smugmug). I'll have to watch that Ted thing. Also I see no need to print pictures in this day and age so don't worry about that. As long as you have a few online somewhere you can always print them in an hour if needed.

But enough about that. This post makes me jealous of your improvement and introspection. I am so so glad things are going so much better with Will's eating and that Brigham comes home by 7:00 (a reasonable expectation for sure but not one Tyler hits with any regularity.) And I'm SURE that Andrew really is way smarter and funnier than most people in general, let alone kids. Happy 2013--the year you get Claire!

Tara, Doug, Isaac, and Lucy said...

I haven't read any blogs for so many months. But I am so happy to see that you get a little girl!

Sarah said...

What a cool idea to capture a snippet of life on film every day. I'm sure that will be a priceless piece of history. I am glad that you are feeling so hopeful about the coming year. Sounds like it's going to be a good one!

Lynne Millar said...

Alexandra, you are my mom/human hero, I hope you realize. I love the way your mind works and it inspires me to be a better person to read your blog.